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Sms jokes - 18 |
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Find the perfect message to send
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Difference b/w
panties of 1970 & 2000 |
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Difference b/w panties of 1970 &
2000 :- In the 70's you had to pull down panties to see the
buttocks, In 2000, you have to separate the buttocks to see the
panties |
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Mother to her
teenage daughter |
Mother to her teenage daughter:
I think it's time that we should talk abt sex..
Daughter: Sure Mom!!, What u want to know?.. |
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Patient: Doctor |
Patient: Doctor aap ko yakeen hai
ke mujhay Namoonia (pneumonia) hai, kyun ke pichlay dino aik
doctor meri friend ka Namoonia ka ilaaj karta raha aur woh
Typhoid say mar gayi.
Munna: Haan ray meray ko pakka yaqeen hai, tu namoonia say hi
maray ga |
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Munna - Patient |
Munna: Bolay to darad kahan hai
aapko.
Patient(F): Pooray badan mien hai
Munna: Yeh kaisay ho sakta hai ray, kuch detail batao.
Patient: Tocuhes her right knee and says here, then touches her
earlobe and says here, then touches her
left cheek and says here, etc.
Munna: Aesay hi khaali peeli tension de reli hai, teri finger
mien dard hai. |
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Munna - Circuit |
Munna: Abay Circuit! Jaa
baajo walay ghar say Doctor ko bula ke laa, meri
tabiat kharab ho reli hai.
Circuit: Aey Bhai ! aap to khud doctor ho.
Munna: Bolay to meri fees buhat zyada hai |
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A guy donated
blood to.... |
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A guy donated blood to his
girlfriend. After a while they broke up and he wanted it back.
The girl threw a pad at him and said. i'll pay u back in monthly
instalments. |
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class me teacher
lecture.......... |
class me teacher lecture de raha
tha, bachon ne dekha us ki zip khuli hui hai, bachay hansne
lagay,
Teacher: kyun hans rahe ho, ab agar hansay ko bahir nikaal ke
khara ker dunga. |
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old man started
making love |
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A 90 yr old man started making
love with his 85 yr wife, he started sucking her breats and
after few seconds the man expired, GUESS WHY?
Autoposy Report : death due
to expired milk. |
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Teacher - student |
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Teacher, billi k itnay saray
bachay kyon hotay hain?
student, miss agar aap bhi kapray uttar kar bahir ghoomain to
aap k us se bhi ziada hon gay. |
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aankh
mein kuch gir gaya |
Mashooka: Lagta hai meri aankh
mein kuch gir gaya, dekho to.
Mashook: Ek tinka dikh to raha hai, kyon na usey wahin rahne
diya jaye main doobonga to sahara dega |
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One day a lady |
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One day a lady coming from from a
woman's meeting said to her husband ntate bare njwale re ya lekana
and the husband replied ba le file marente na? |
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A woman - doctor |
A woman goes to a doctor & said:
doctor! can u make another hole near my v--na?
Dr: why?
woman: bussines is doing good, so i'm planing to open a new
branch |
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I want
to kiss ur wife |
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Mukesh says to Anil Ambani:"I
want
to kiss ur wife". Anil replied: "Ok but 40paisa per min" anil
wife shouted "don't cheat him. Reliance to reliance free. |
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life before
marriage is |
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2)life before marriage is
AIRTEL-aisi agadi aur kaha! After marriage is HUTCH- whenever go
network follows u. but after 5 years life is notreachable. |
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School- a place
where |
School- a place where papa pays &
son plays.
Life insurance- a contract tht keeps you poor all ur
Life so tht you can die rich.
Nurse- a person wakes up to give you sleeping pills.
Marriage- a contract in which a boy loses his.
Bachelors degree & girl gets her masters degree. |
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a sardar was
working |
a sardar was working 1st time in a
garment shop.
a customer GIRL asks: underwear dikhana'
sardar thora sharma ker: g aaj pehna nahi ha. |
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